Tiny caskets...broken hearts...

Tomorrow is the funeral. I wish I could be there to hold my friend's  hand, to be a shoulder. Tomorrow they have to say goodbye to his earthly body, look at the tiny casket...one far too small. There is never the right size casket when it comes to burying your child. They are always too small, too constraining, too wrong.

The family saying goodbye for the last time...hearts breaking, cries out for understanding...understanding that will never come. There is no rhyme or reason to this disease...one never knows how it might affect one or another. This is why it is especially scary...one never knows if your own family may be in the cross hairs.

Over the last ten years there have been too many of these days...too many tiny caskets. With so few affected, the sheer number lost is overwhelming. Over one hundred children lost...each one shattering the community, each an irreplaceable piece of our collective heart. Each day we get closer to a cure and yet each day comes on borrowed time...not fast enough, not soon enough...the losses still racking up. It is frustrating.

So tomorrow we mourn, a soul lost too soon, a boy gone to the playground in heaven, a family that will try to put the pieces together over time. It will not be easy, it will not be quick...it is a long journey that no one really understands. It is a small club of people that are each trying to move forward...one day at a time.

Sweet boy...I will miss you...my heart is broken...for my daughter, for your mother, for your family...your sweet spirit can never be replaced. Until we see you again...run freely, breathe easy, and enjoy a playground filled with boys and girls like you. We love you. <3


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