Looking inside...starting anew...

Once you have opened up and let people into the rabbit hole, it is hard to know what to say. I am here...I am moving forward, I am building something new and fresh...

I am ready to begin this new stage in my life...

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Just Stop....

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Note: This might be more of my opinion than you like...I am sorry if you don't agree. I am comfortable agreeing to disagree...Just my thoughts today!


Today I had another migraine...I am over it. Two awful headaches in two weeks requiring medication...Ugh! Sometimes I want to tell my body...stop, JUST STOP!!! Stop hurting, stop! I have had enough...

There are so many times this year I want to say: Just Stop!

To my students:Just Stop! I know that you think that you know what it's going to be like in high school, but you don't. I really have knowledge here and I want to help you...Trust me!

To the Parents:Just Stop! Stop blaming others and help us help your student. Know that your vote matters. We want to support your student...we love them too, but we can't without money and volunteer time. Come to events, let us help you, help them...

To my district:Just Stop! I know that the OAKS test is important (our state assessment), but we need to focus on teaching our students to th…
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Kisses....

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Have you ever really thought about the act of kissing? Two pairs of soft lips pressed together, emotion being transmitted from one pair to the other. Kissing is one of the most intimate acts we can engage in with another person. Most people think that sex is the most intimate, but if you really think about it...kissing tops the list.

Kissing is that first foray into a relationship, the first step in opening ourselves up to another. Relationships are complicated, both those of the romantic nature and those of the platonic. Deciding if you want to take a relationship to the "next level" can be heart wrenching. Opening your heart and soul to another is intimate, exciting, and frightening.

When we are young, we anxiously await our first kiss, that first connection with another human that we aren't related to. Often these first connections are found behind shrubs, buildings, nooks and crannies hidden away for these private meetings.

Our first real relationship, where you beg…
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Rising up...

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In the spring after Javad's seizure, I began attending Portland Timbers games fairly regularly. Slowly, I found my tribe. People who accepted me for me, not forming their opinion or relationship with me in regards to Javad. I was struggling emotionally and having a distraction that I loved, soccer, was a way for me to begin to heal.

That year was a strange one. Javad and the Timbers. That was when I was writing more. I wrote about Javad, the Timbers and the MLS Cup that year. When you are desperate to find hope because you see none (or little), you begin to look for things that will keep you grounded. Providence Park became my safe place, my home, my church. It became the place where I could see myself as whole. I wasn't whole by any means and am still putting the pieces of myself together.

Now, after watching Javad, I know that healing doesn't come quickly. Watching his body struggle to heal, piece by piece, helps me to see why it is taking so long to heal. The mind, like…
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