When I was in high school and entering college, I thought I would be a high school science teacher. Science was my love and I had some amazing science teachers who not only nurtured my love for science, but also my love for life. They were shining examples of how a teacher could make a powerful impact on a student both academically and personally. I went to college single minded and didn't really explore many other options until much later, when making a change would have been too late. Don't get me wrong...I believe that the path we each travel prepares us for something in our future and my love for science (and genetics in particular), prepared me for the birth and life of our cutest boy. Having a child with a rare genetic disease, when you were fascinated by rare genetic diseases in your twenties, helps. It made things a bit less scary.
Each of us is here and travel these paths for a unique and powerful purpose. We never know the reason that we are having an experience, meeting a person, crossing a path into unexpected territory. Even those who are not religious, I imagine, might use the phrase "having faith." Our lives are what they are and the experiences we have prepare us for experiences in our future. Each of these experiences a "moment" that brings us to the next moment in our lives...something to be remembered, revisited, enjoyed. A part of our story to be retold, remembered, relived.
There are so many moments in life that sometimes I am in awe...putting together the pieces of my life, seeing that it didn't turn out as imagined. Tonight, as I am walking through the house, my heart smiles at the sight of my husband and two of my sons, home, sleeping, but here. Kissing the cutest boy nightly makes my heart melt.
Our lives are so many experiences that it is often too full to remember. We piece together the good parts and try to smudge out the bad so they are not dominant messages in our heads. Some ponder the idea of how a different decision would have altered their life path. This is true, of course, but then this new path wouldn't have been the life that they are currently living. It is akin to people asking if the cutest boy was healthy, how different our life would be. If he was healthy, he would not be the same boy. I would love him, none-the-less, but how could I compare this life that I have with him to one where I am a soccer mom, chasing him around? It would be different...he would have different experiences as a boy and I, as his mother.
We often think if we could change one thing that we would have a better life...each moment is it's own and brings something special to our journey. If the moment changed, our journey would as well.
As I look toward my own future and prepare for my journey ahead, I wonder what experiences are in store for me...This brings me a sense of excitement, for I know that with these moments in my life, these experiences, I am building my own path, my journey, one building block at a time. This journey is uniquely mine and with each moment, memories will be built. Ones to relive and remember throughout my future.
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